Dear Betsy,
I'm in love with my English lecturer, a certain silver fox. He is totally gorgeous and in every seminar I have with him I just find myself starring at him and I think I'm in danger of failing my course. I imagine having a private session, in which I make my advances and he succumbs. Do you suggest trying this out in real life?
Love Foxy
Foxy,
Officially, I have to tell you that student and lecturer relationships are frowned upon, if not actually forbidden. However, if the silver fox is who I think he is, I say go for it. Every girl needs a sugar daddy at one point in her life and there is something deliciously illicit about an affair with a tutor.
Betsy
Dear Betsy,
I got really drunk the other night and ended up taking this guy home. We had great sex but when I woke up and saw him in the clear light of day I realised he was ginger. Unfortunately I had already given him my number and now he won't stop texting me. How do I tell him that I just don't date ginger people?
Ginger Whinger
Ginger Whinger,
Red hair is meant to be the sign of a 'beastly sexual nature and moral degeneration' so, if you want to continue having 'great sex' I suggest you get over yourself and call him, especially considering that another characteristic of redheads is violence (see Braveheart).
Betsy
Dear Betsy,
I was back in my hometown the other night and bumped into a stag party. A challenge for the stag was to get a pair of pants and he offered to buy mine off me for £20. Being the drunkard that I was, I agreed, dashed off to the toilets and came back pants in hand. Receiving my payment I then proceeded to buy a drink for my boyfriend who is now really pissed off with me. Is it just me or is he being unreasonable?
Love Excited Entrepreneur
EE,
Absolutely, 100% unreasonable. You saw a chance to make some money and you took it. I applaud your businesswoman-like attitude. Obviously you've landed yourself with one of these sexist types who can't bear their girlfriends to be more successful than them. Dump him.
Betsy
